This passed weekend we found ourselves in Cali again.
The fiancé asked me last minute if I wanted to get away for the weekend and being who I am of course I said yes!
While we were in California, I posted a picture of the sunset at the beach on instagram with words of my greatest fear attached. This fear is so real to me. - I am afraid of living a life that is ordinary. I want a life full of extraordinary.- Along with that fear, I am afraid of being in one place for too long. Afraid of becoming stagnant. I have grown to love the unknown. The unknown is my adrenaline in life. Now don't get me wrong here because I am as terrified of the unknown as the next person. However, I have grown to love the unknown and to actually need it in my life. I want to conquer the unknown.
Now let's get down to the whole point I am trying to make because I am more than sure you are wondering where exactly I am going with this. Well, I had come to the conclusion a while back that marriage and children probably weren't going to fit into these desires for an adventurous fly by the seat of your pants type lifestyle. I struggled with the thought that I would either have to live this life on my own travelling, and wandering in a constant unknown state of life. OR I would settle down, get married, have babies and dream of the days that could have been. Neither however would be good enough for me. So I carried on just being here, there and everywhere. Every so often I would wonder and contemplate both scenarios in my mind and heart. All along praying I could just have my darn cake and eat it too. When what would you know…all the sudden I found a man who plans random trips, buys airline tickets just for the sake of adventure, and fulfills my wandering heart every chance he can.
Be still my heart I have finally found it. Him. After all, the best love is the one that makes you a better person without changing you into someone other than yourself.
And that's all I have to say about that.